Love’s Most Frequent Question | Yang Sering Kita Tanyakan, tentang Cinta

We often ask ourself what love really is. A definite question for which everyone comes up with different answer.

They say it’s a commitment.

They believe it’s a trust.

They claim it’s a friendship.

They define it as an acceptance.

For Zaki and me, love is THIS.

Whatever we have and share in the last 12 years. The thing that binds us together no matter what we’ve been through. Love is the way he makes me laugh the loudest and cry the saddest, and vice versa. Love is whenever we argue, we fight, and we hate each other, just to finally realise that we’re only two stubborn persons who can’t live, normally, without one another.

For us, love is about finding all the possible definitions, together.

Happy wedding anniversary, Zaki! Cheers to the answers we’ve defined and a lot more we are yet to find!

Lund, March 7, 2018

Continue reading “Love’s Most Frequent Question | Yang Sering Kita Tanyakan, tentang Cinta”


Zaki and I had a bedtime talk the other day, about me who had just changed my current crush from Alexander Skarsgård to Thomas Beaudoin. He found it’s bit strange because I change my crush like a girl changes her dress (yeah, just like that Katy Perry’s song 😆). Very quickly.

Unlike him who’s “committed” to Jennifer Aniston since F.R.I.E.N.D.S was still the biggest show on TV (I know. It’s so last year, right? Told Zaki already!). None of my crushes stayed for more than a month. I’m too easy to fall for someone indeed. I watch a movie for once and I can instantly crazy over one of the characters. It’s been like that since forever. I once obsessed with Jude Law, Matthew Goode, Hugh Grant, Hugh Jackman, Josh Hutcherson, Miles Teller, Armie Hammer, Shah Rukh Khan, Chris Pratt, Alexander Skarsgård and the list went on. Currently, I’m smitten by a Canadian actor: Thomas Beaudoin which I first noticed from a cheesy romantic comedy on Netflix 😅. But I’m 100% sure it won’t last long. Give me few weeks and I will easily move to another crush. Haha. That’s just how it is. Easy come, easy go.

Continue reading “Crush”

30 Something and Over It

Looking back on the birthdays I had in the last 31 years, I realized how life around me has changed, and changed the way I see my life as well.

I personally think that birthday is a paradox moment. The day when we feel happy on one side because there’s no other day that is more ours than that day. But, on the other side, we also feel sad or at least worried to know that we are older than before. Ha. (Somebody pass me that anti aging cream, please! 😆 )

I don’t celebrate birthday often. Not in a way it’s usually celebrated. There is no big celebration tradition in my family. Birthday is just like any other day. Though I remember, there were some small birthday parties when I was a little kid. The simple parties with the same routine: my mom bought two regular cakes, stacked them, then decorated them with fresh flowers and leaves ( yes, no fancy icing whatsoever. I didn’t even know that black forest cake was exist at that time 😂 ), or we would buy something special for dinner like chicken satay or Javanese noodle, then took a family picture. Just like that. Sometimes I got presents. Sometimes I didn’t. But it didn’t really matter. The happiness was still mine because I was surrounded by the people I love and love me back.

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When Ms Random meets Mr Planner

Saat-saat ketika merencanakan perjalanan adalah saat-saat di mana saya semakin menyadari betapa sesungguhnya saya dan suami adalah pribadi yang sangat bertolak belakang. Saya adalah manusia random. Happy go lucky person yang percaya bahwa semesta telah diatur sedemikian rupa. Cenderung mengalir saja tanpa perencanaan. Sementara suami adalah Mr Planner sejati. Sangat perhatian pada detail dan memiliki manajemen resiko yang terlalu tinggi. Hampir semua hal dalam hidupnya melalui perencanaan matang. Satu-satunya hal spontan yang pernah dia lakukan (yang masih dia ingat) adalah menjadikan saya sebagai pacarnya meski baru beberapa minggu kenal. Haha. Dan ini yang biasanya menjadi kartu AS saya untuk mengingatkan bahwa beberapa hal baik justru dimulai dari sebuah kesertamertaan (ahem!).

Tentu saja sebagai pasangan kami juga saling memengaruhi. Saya tak lagi anti rencana. Sementara dia mulai bisa menerima fakta bahwa tidak semua hal bisa ia kendalikan. Tapi tetap saja, yang namanya karakter dasar tidak bisa 100% diubah. Saya masih kerap ceroboh dan masa bodoh. Suami masih suka khawatir berlebih dan uring-uringan. Dan karakter dasar itu semakin menguat justru ketika kami dihadapkan pada satu hal yang sama-sama kami sukai: traveling!

Continue reading “When Ms Random meets Mr Planner”

Lund, 17 Juli

Thank you for growing old with me

Cinta membawa kita menua bersama,

Sejak sebelas tahun yang lalu,


Dan (semoga) untuk seterusnya

Cinta membawa kita melewati pergantian usia bersama,

Dalam hingar bingar masa muda,

Dalam sepi yang sempat diciptakan oleh jarak,

Dan dalam hening,

Serangkaian doa yang kupintakan untukmu secara rutin:

Agar mudah semua urusanmu,

Agar berkah umur barumu,

Agar cinta tak pernah lelah membawamu melangkah sejauh apapun,



Thank you for bringing out the best in me

Dear daughter,

Since the day you were born,

I try to be the person you can rely on

Though I may not be perfect, I’m grateful you are growing up as a better version of me and your dad

Happy birthday, my sweetie pie

I’m wishing you thousands of bless, countless happiness and anything at its best.


Bunda Hayu

The Story of the Unsettled Family

I was driving one of my good friends to the airport when he asked,

“So you’re moving to Sweden? All of you?”

“Yes!” I replied.


“By the end of this month or early December maximum.”

And then he gave me that “whatttt???” look, showing how surprised he was to know about our decision.

“But you’ve just come back from Australia and build a career in Indonesia, and now you’re gonna move to somewhere far for quite a long time. Oh, wow!” he added.

“I know. We are definitely an unsettled family, hahaha, ” I said in laugh.

Continue reading “The Story of the Unsettled Family”

Bagaimana Caranya Merindumu?

“Sengaja tak lagi kulirik jam yang berdetik.

Agar tak terasa lama, saat-saat kita kembali bersua.

Karena sungguh, aku tak tahu lagi bagaimana caranya menunggumu.

Bait-bait kangenku mulai sumbang.

Kalimat-kalimat rinduku mulai berulang-ulang.

Mungkin rasaku telah kehabisan kosakata.

Menantimu telah mementahkan semua frasa.

Atau mungkin sudah saatnya kamu pulang.

Agar semua kerinduan ini cukup tersampaikan dalam satu pelukan.”


7 Oktober 2016